My favorite colors are olive green and lilac. You’re probably frowning in confusion right now. Maybe even gasping in disgust. I stand by my choices. Stop shaming me and my favorite colors.

Yes, I like that dingy shade of green where it begins to blur into gray and brown, like the moss that clings to the sides of fallen trees. I think it’s a delightful color, really, almost as nice as umber and ochre, though burnt sienna doesn’t even hold a candle to it. It goes best with deep browns or gray-blue.

And lilac is so fun! Don’t deny that tassels in that color would make a great accent to just about anything. So much more interesting than mauve, honestly. It’s exactly like the flowers—what’s not to love?

My hot take here is entirely unironic, and I actually like these colors. But what I think we need more of in this world is novelty and whimsy. Give me more purple and yellow and pastel blue and all of those colors that designers seem to shy away from in clothes nowadays. Make something that looks absolutely outrageous, like when one of my friends wore a top hat and skirt and cat ears to a dance! And if you see someone with the guts to pull that off, you give them a high-five and congratulate them.

But I digress. There’s much more to say on the topic of olive and lil—wait, you have something to suggest? Taupe and teal, you say? Well, I think you might be onto something with that. I’m certainly not in a position to pass judgment.