I’ve noticed a strange trend where people either say that high school is amazing and the best years of your life, or they say that high school is horrible and yet another thing children are forced to endure on the arduous route to becoming a person. After the horrors of middle school, I began to suspect that the latter statement was more true than the former.

Thus far, I have been pleasantly surprised. Sure, I’ve only been here for a few weeks, but it could’ve been worse. The back-to-school transition felt relatively smooth, which makes sense seeing as I’ve done it nine times now. There’s a lot more homework, but it’s manageable. The construction is kind of funny except for the one day where the walls of my history class were screaming at unpredictable intervals. The clubs are amazing, and it still boggles the mind that I can just leave the building during lunch. At my middle school, we would get yelled at for even getting out of seats in the cafeteria. I’ve found high school infinitely better than middle school, if slightly overwhelming.

But alas, I am but one freshman, and not representative of the entire 2023 VPM Freshman Experience™. To rectify this grievous error, I asked a few friends to try and sum up their first impressions of VPM. I received some…interesting answers. Some highlights include:

                                                     “I’m so excited for the end of the school year.”

                                                     “Better than middle school, but more homework.”

                                                                           “I am so dead inside.”

                                                                         And, memorably, “Big.”

So there you have it! A totally exhaustive, completely conclusive report on the entirety of the 2023 VPM Freshman Experience™. We think high school is “Big.”

High school is, somewhat surprisingly, much better than I had expected. Much of popular media seems to try its hardest to convince children that high school is either a cesspool of gossip that occasionally breaks into song or a cesspool of gossip that occasionally becomes rife with dramatic suicides that in reality are accidental murders framed as suicides to avoid suspicion. 

I, wizened contrarian that I am, was convinced that high school would be a lot like middle school: something miserable that you must make the best of to move forward in life, except bigger. I went into ninth grade braced for this. In reality, it’s actually been pretty nice so far. Getting around may be a little confusing, with all the hallways looking the same, and sometimes you turn a corner and see someone really, almost implausibly tall, but overall I’ve been having a great time! The clubs are wonderful, and all the ones I’ve managed to weasel my way into seem pretty great so far. If you haven’t joined any clubs, I would seriously recommend looking into it. They’re such a great way to meet cool people.

Speaking of cool people, another unexpected thing is that I keep meeting people who are unnaturally similar to me. I’ve met someone who’s obsessed with the same band that I am. I’ve met someone who lived in the exact same town as I did before moving to Madison at the exact same age that I later moved to Madison. I already have a silly little handshake with someone whose existence I found out about a little over two weeks ago. It’s awe-inspiring and even a little scary thinking about how many people out there I share things with. How many connections I may have with others that are yet undiscovered. I think that this, more than anything, has been the best thing about high school.

There are a few downsides, of course, but not many that are immediately apparent. I think they’re lying in wait. Like groundhogs. Speculation on these hypothetical groundhogs is a pointless exercise in pessimism, and most cons that come to mind feel rather frivolous. Sure, I have more homework, but that’s because I’m actually learning things in class. It’s amazing! I’ve been riding this excessively strange feeling for days now! I feel like those tigers when they get a rubber ball they have to maul the meat out of! I am enriched! I am so, so scared that this feeling is not going to last and I will crash and die in the second semester! High school!!!