I learned of the deep sea giant isopod— the deep sea giant isopod is a graceful invertebrate that resembles the average pill bug in form, but spans up to 16 inches in length—when I was but a young lad paging through my family’s collection of comic strips. Even stylized, I could tell that it was a formidable thing, worthy of great respect. This was knowledge I expected others to possess as well, and yet awareness of the deep sea giant isopod seems pitifully low. This is an utter travesty, as it is obviously superior to many other aquatic lifeforms with greater fame.

The first, most obvious factor in this is the fact that the deep sea giant isopod (hereafter referred to as Todd for ease of conversation) lives in the deep sea. Most wimpy sea life, such as sea turtles or dolphins, cannot tolerate the pressures that come with living 1600 feet below the ocean’s surface and thus would perish if they ever attempted to do battle with the mighty Todd. And unlike these pathetic beasts, Todd can survive at surface pressures. They just can’t have too much oxygen.

Todd also has a leg up over the majority of their deep-sea competitors. In fact, they have several legs up. 14 of them. But Todd’s talents aren’t solely in scuttling! They can also swim, using their tails (uropods) and their swimmerets (pleopods). I suggest looking up a video of this (the Monterey Bay Aquarium has one) as it is very very funny to watch them swim. They look like little space shuttles, making them obviously superior to every other creature in the deep sea.

In conclusion, Todd is the most magnificent beast to ever grace our seas, and it is frankly a crime that so few people have heard of them. I implore that you educate yourself on these delightful creatures however you can.